If or One day I become an Orphan

This few days I don't feel that I need to post a comment in the facebook. Perhaps, I just write everything & what I feel in my blog. I would feel better. Well, I've decided to go back Sabah for Chinese New Year ( CNY ) on 14th-19th Feb because it is once a year for me to go back to visit my dearest mom & friends ^^ I miss them so much :-)


Three days ago
Early in the morning mommy called me to ask regarding to go back hometown for CNY. A day before she called up,I was as busy as an ant in Zara. Its everyday busy with many job functions & I was tired. After work I was restless to continue to online search for the flight ticket. I didn't get enough time to sleep and start to become emo the next day no matter on/off duty. When emo,I was really damn quiet & cool obviously not smiling at all- I don't give a shit. I only kept this for myself. When I was on my bed sleeping, my phone rang !!! ergh.. It was my mom again to ask. I just had to answer the call. Inside my heart, seriously I want to be frank to tell her :

" Mom~ ! I'm sleeping.. Ur son is very tired when working & in addition need to spend the extra time of 'supposably-already-sleep-at night' to search for the flight ticket after work. After that,I've awaken by Ur call to keep asking me the same question. I can't continue to sleep back. This really effect me when I go to work later. Did U understand how tension I am trying my best to manage the work & personal issues by my own without acknowledge U nor to make U worry so much? Honestly I only get 3-4hours to sleep after working like ' hell-long-hours-of-sucking-strength' in Zara !"

But, I just persuade my mom that I could settle it & I already awake :-( ... gosh~

Two days ago
Like usual I worked. During my break, I'd decided to call my mom just to be honest how miserable I went through this beh tahan difficulty. I had an hour of break time. I spent 55minutes of crying & shouting conversation line with my mom in the locker room. I want her to understand my condition & it was absolutely a tearful scene. Finally,my mom understood & I told her I need 5minutes to eat & goodbye. I'd see how & let her know asap due to the CNY flight ticket. Within 5minutes of not wasting my time, I stopped to cry & resumed my calmness, quickly go to the RotiBoy to buy a bun, chicken ham sandwich & a DutchLady milk. That was my meal. Sigh !

Yesterday
After finish my work. I went to mamak to eat dinner with my colleagues. I met Evern's brother,Clevin & his girlfriend. The mamak was a walking distance to my condo. So, I went back to bathe. After that, I yumcha with him. I tell him my situation & he did give me advisable remembrance, I appreciate it. Thanks ^^


P/S : I always love my mom :-)
-StevenPSJ-